TWHS#098: Be Authentic or Adapt Your Style?

 Hi Folks

I've had a busy start to the year. I've run in-person workshops, online seminars and even been a guest on the CTO Lens podcast. It's still only January!

There's been a recurring question that has literally come up in every one of those sessions:

When you're trying to communicate effectively and influence people, should you be authentic or should you adapt your style?

Ooooh - what a question! Let's dig into it.

Be Self Aware

Everyone should build their self-awareness. Know your strengths and weaknesses. Understand what blindspots appear when you over-index on your strengths.

Maybe you're brilliant at getting to the point quickly. Fantastic! But if you're talking to someone who needs context and detail, your efficiency becomes a weakness. They'll feel rushed and confused.

Or perhaps you're naturally empathetic and take time to build relationships. Great! But if your stakeholder needs a quick decision, they'll think you're waffling.

Self-awareness means knowing when your natural style helps and when it hinders.

Be Listener Centric

Amp up your listener centricity. Be a little less "me, me, me" and be a bit more "you, you, you."

If your boss wants bottom-line impact in 30 seconds, give them that. If your team member needs to talk through the problem before they can solve it, create that space.

Adapting your style doesn't mean you're inauthentic. It means you care enough about the other person to communicate in a way that helps them hear you.

The Balance

You know what - presenting as a fundamentally different person is inauthentic and it will backfire. People smell fake a mile off.

But adapting your natural style to meet someone where they are? That's just good communication.

Think of it like speaking to a five-year-old versus speaking to your CEO. You don't become a different person. You just choose words, pace and detail that work for your audience.

Be authentically you. But be self-aware enough and listener-centric enough to flex your style.

That's not being fake. That's being effective.

Hope this helps.

BenP

-------------------------------------

Whenever you're ready, there are 3 ways I can help you:

• Leaders In Tech: Raise the impact of your team.  Make them more influential, memorable and successful with customers everyday.  The Technical Storytelling Professional Program enables them to create clarity, generate energy and drive the results you need.
• Individuals: Accelerate your career and build your reputation.  Develop the skills to help you present,  influence and explain in the tech world.  Check out the Technical Storytelling Essentials or Tech Community Speaker courses.
• Tech World Human Skills Podcast:  The latest episode is "Value Engineering 101" with Paul Harris. Check it out on the Elevated You website,  Apple, Spotify, YouTube or Amazon Podcasts.